Two Quotes and a Comment

These are two quotes from a book I was assigned to read in my Cultivating Creative Expression Through Music class (long name for a class that is basically elementary school music), titled The Art of Possibility.

"Mistakes can be like ice. If we resist them, we may keep on slipping into a posture of defeat. If we include mistakes in our definition of performance, we are likely to glide through them and appreciate the beauty of the longer run."

-Rosamund Stone Zander

"There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and it will be lost. The would will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is nor how vulnerable nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open."

-Martha Graham

Something I said the other day as a comment on my optimism and just how beautiful of a day it was:

"Instead of having to look on the bright side, today it just is the bright side." : )

How I Got to Where I Am Now

Recently I have been thinking about God's plan for my life and how I know that I will end up exactly where He needs me to be. I know this because of where I am now. 

I will start with my literal position in the world. I live in the tiny town of Boone and attend Appalachian State University. This came as a surprise to basically everyone at my high school. I graduated something like number 29 in my class of 555. My GPA was 4.46 and I took 6 AP classes. My adviser told me I needed to apply to more rigorous schools, and my teachers willingly filled out recommendations for various schools and scholarships. I applied to UNC Wilmington, App State and UNC Chapel Hill and was accepted to all three school. I am not saying this to brag by any means, but to say that I was "supposed" to go to Carolina.  You should have seen Ms. Douglass' (my AP English teacher) face when I announced to the class that I had turned down Carolina for Appalachian! People ask me all the time why I didn't go to Carolina. It is a hard thing to explain to people who are not Christians, because I don't really have a logical reason. I may say it is because I liked the Elementary Ed program at App better (which is true) but really it is because I know God wanted me at App. I felt peace about it and just knew it was God.

Along with the college I attend is the major I selected. I mentioned before that I took some of the toughest classes offered at Wakefield and got good grades in them. I was also the fist chair cellist junior year and solo cellist senior year in the orchestra. I love music sooo much and music theory just comes naturally to me. I can say the thing I found the most pleasure working hard in was music. But I am not a music major. Not even music education. I am doing Elementary Ed partly because I have always said that was what I was going to do, but also because I honestly can't see myself being so extremely happy doing anything else. I have spent years in prayer over what I should major in, and God has yet to change my heart to desire anything else. 

So maybe people think I am not reaching my potential or just taking the easy way out, I am happy to tell you that they are highly mistaken. I am going to do what God wants me to do, and if it looks foolish to anyone else, too bad.

Hoopoe!

Something very exciting just happened to me! I discovered my new favorite animal! Its called a Hoopoe (pronounced "who-poo" haha! :)) I was on this wonderful website sporkle.com and i was doing a quiz on animals from the Bible. Apparently, in Leviticus 11:19, the hoopoe is mentioned. Naturally, I googled it and look at what i found!!!

Appartment Search

This weekend I really need to decide on a place to live. Courtney and I are really set on being room mates but we just can't seem to find the right place. After a day full of dramatic over-thinking and worry, we watched a movie to take our mind off the stress. By the end, we knew it was silly to worry because God will always provide for us!

"I believe in wise planning, but if after doing all you are able to do, you still are fearful of the future, the Lord says, 'Don't worry.'" 
-John MacArthur Anxious for Nothing

Our options so far:

1. Apply for on campus housing and either end up in a better dorm, end up in the same dorm that we don't like, or not get chosen in the lottery at all.
2. Live in University Highlands, but it will be really expensive to pay for it over the summer, meaning no camp :(
3. Sarah Herbert told us about a friend who was looking for 3 room mates. Its a good place to live but the email address we were giving to contact them led us to nowhere.
4. Our small group leader Lucy is moving out of her downstairs apartment in a cute little house with 2 girls living upstairs and they are looking for someone to move in. I have been to the house and it is soooo pretty! It is the best and cheapest option but there is not AppalCart (hate that thing!) route so we would both need cars.
5. Keep looking for places!!

Sandcastles

I recently started read the book Crazy Love by Frances Chan. It was honestly a life changing read! It took me three days to finish it and there were moments where i just had to stop and literally just sit and do nothing. As a result, I have decided to work more on loving people. I will say that I am willing to do anything for anyone, expecting nothing in return, even for those who have hurt me. 

This Is Strange

Right now I am in Ohio visiting family with my dad. When we left Raleigh there was 7-8 inches of snow on the ground. As we drove up through Virginia, West Virginia and into Ohio, the snow just got less and less! Since when does Raleigh get more snow than up north! Ahhhhh! (Btw: the pic is from Boone and neither Raleigh or Ohio. Maybe i should find my camera...)

Oops!

I live my life trying to appear perfect. I hate having to admit my faults, and my own conscious can be my own worst enemy at times. I rarely open up to people. I am writing this post to tell you that I am NOT perfect. Don't let any of your past encounters with me fool you. I mess up, make mistakes and have an extremely cluttered desk. Ask my room mate and she will tell you. Underneath my organized projection of myself is about half my wardrobe lying on the floor (mostly due to the fact that i have to wear about 203975 layers to step outside these days) and a bed that is never made (i just don't see the point!). 

Last night I was wondering why even though i try so hard, I feel like I am constantly disappointing God. And then I realized that God allows us to sin. No, God does not like sin, in fact he HATES sin. But the reason sin was introduced in the first place was so that we are forced to make a choice. Have faith in God, or reject Him. God didn't want robots. But once I accepted Christ as my Savior, why was I not made perfect right away? God uses our mistakes and failures to teach us. He also uses them to teach others. When I think about all the people in the Bible who God set as examples for us to follow, I can also find a flaw to each of them. Every Single Person. Everyone. All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. (Romans 3:23). Something else I realized is that i shouldn't worry that my mistakes will affect God's will for my life. I am earnestly seeking His will and whatever He wants to happen with my life, will happen. It is silly of me to think that my actions would have enough effect to alter, much less ruin, God's perfect plan. So you know waht, i thinkk its ok for me to not be perfec t right now. it wil just make heaven that much better!